Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn-Proofing Today's Young Kids
Good Pictures Bad Pictures is a comfortable, read-aloud story about a mom and dad who teach their child what pornography is, why it's dangerous, and how to reject it. Using easy-to-understand science and simple analogies, this ground-breaking book engages young kids to porn-prooftheir own brains.
The 5-point CAN DO Plan teaches kids how to avoid the brain-warping images of pornography and minimize the troubling memories of accidental exposure that often tempt kids to look for more and lead them into a dark and destructive addiction. To stay safe in the digital age, kids must install an internal filter in their own brain. Good Pictures Bad Pictures shows them how.
It only takes a few taps on a mobile device for a curious young child to find an endless supply of deviant, hard-core, and addicting pornography--all for free. Unfortunately, many young kids are being exposed to pornography without the slightest clue that it can damage their developing minds.
Parents will appreciate this resource to porn-proof their kids because it makes a difficult discussion easy and empowering. How? By teaching kids simple concepts about the brain and the process of addiction, and by giving them a specific strategy for keeping safe from the poison of pornography. Many parents also use this book as a powerful tool for sexual abuse prevention!
Reviews (400)
If you're thinking about having this discussion with your children, this book is a great place to start!
Highly recommend!! I have a 15 year old, 9 year old and a 7 year old who all have laptops, iPads and iPhones. I have set up parental controls, but I understand those only go so far. After learning from a morning radio podcast that the average age children are being exposed to porn for the first time is between 8-11, I realized the best thing to do was have a discussion. Without this book, I'm not exactly sure where I would've started. Let's face it-- it's not the most comfortable conversation you're going to have with your kids. So it helps to have something to refer to. I really like the no-shame approach the author takes. It's so much more than just "don't watch or look at porn." It gave my children a real understanding about the brain and its natural response to pornography, how it can affect you if you look at it, and how to be prepared when you do come across it (since, let's face it... it's gonna happen at some point). It says the recommended age is 8+, but I involved my 7 year old in our conversation and he fully understood. Another thing I would like to point out, is that even if you haven't had the talk about the "birds & the bees", this book is still for you. It didn't raise any questions about sex, which I could appreciate since we're not quite ready to have that discussion with our younger ones. The reason why it doesn't go there, is because it doesn't go into detail about what is involved in pornagraphic videos- it simply describes pornography as "pictures, videos or even cartoons of people with little or no clothes on".
What my daughter learned from this book:
I just finished reading "Good Pictures Bad Pictures" with my 7-year-old daughter. At the end of each chapter, she wanted to dictate her notes to me and have me record them in the book. I thought you might get a kick out of her notes. As you can see, she missed the boat slightly in some areas, but some of her comments show impressive maturity and comprehension. Also, she is adorable. “You can’t look at pornography. If someone offers to show you a picture, just ask what it’s about and if it’s a surprise just don’t look at it. Addiction make you start lying to your family and friends. And you must not try things you could be addicted to once. And you can joke about things you might be addicted to like, ‘I’m addicted to Dippin’ Dots.’ Cuz Dippin’ Dots are good. My feeling brain makes me thirsty and decide what to eat and also rewards me for what I do right. But if I start to do pornography my feeling brain might start to reward me for it. But if I’m smart enough to not feel rewarded then my feeling brain will make me feel bad for looking at pornography. I learned to try to not get addicted to stuff like pornography or drinking or smoking or taking yummy pills even if I don’t need them. The more I use my thinking brain, the stronger it gets. Even if I’m about to look at pornography, my thinking brain says, “No!” If I’m doing my math homework my thinking brain gets stronger about pornography. I learned to leave my thinking brain in charge and let my feeling brain help me know what I want to do unless I’m spoiled. If I want to run into the street, I don’t have to get there immediately. Say I just got home from “Color Me Mine” and I run across the street without stopping to think. I might get hit by a car, or, more luckily, almost hit by a car. I learned not to take drugs. Drugs will probably make you get pictures of pornography and trick people into looking at them even if they don’t want to. Drugs can make you lie about whether something is pornography. If you’re watching your favorite movie, there might be some pornography in it. When your brain starts looking at pornography, it starts to make its own kind of drug. After you finish pornography, you stop having the drug that your brain makes. After the drug stops, you feel pain. Some people take drugs only to feel better. Instead of doing drugs or pornography, do something you like. If you still feel unhappy DO NOT TAKE DRUGS. Just wait. Do not take drugs. Just like go outside and lay on the grass. I tried it once and it really helped.”
Misses the mark
Setting kids up for a future of shame! Not all nudity is porn. And using the word "bad".......stop it. Totally leads to feelings of inadequacy and shame bc we all come across porn at some point. Lot's of "don't". I totally appreciate what they are trying to do here, but it's very judgy morally and I will not be reading this to my kids.
Review by a Mother/Therapist
As a Licensed Professional Counselor I have extensive training in the sex addiction field. I am grateful for this sound, easy to read clinical resource for families. I am a therapist to Partners of Porn/Sex Compulsions/Addictions and Adult Children of Porn/Sex Compulsion/Addictions. I see and hear on a daily basis the trauma that compulsive Porn viewing does to a person, his/her family, and the community as a whole. This book describes how the brain is impacted by ‘porn use’ in a way that even a child can understand. I personally sought out this book for my 6-year when he tearfully reported seeing naked people on a 6 year-old friend’s phone. My son was not able to verbalize what he had seen. Thankfully Good Pictures/Bad Pictures explained to him in easy terms that he had seen pornography. The most valuable lesson that my son verbalized was that he could choose to use his thinking or feeling brain at a young age and he could protect his own brain. My clients read Good Pictures Bad Pictures to their children to explain how compulsive porn has impacted mom, dad and/or siblings because children know there is a problem in the home, but they just don’t know what it is! This book gives clients the opportunity to shine light on compulsive porn use in an age appropriate way. Adult clients also find it easier to understand compulsive porn viewing because of how easy the authors explain addiction in the brain. I highly recommend this book for parents that want to prepare their children for what they may view on a phone/video game/laptop at even the most innocent of ages as my own 6 year old. I also highly recommend this book as education for Families of Compulsive Porn Addicts. Cassie Kingan, MA, PC, CCPS, CCTP Professional Counselor Certified Clinical Partner Specialist Certified Clinical Trauma Professional
Excellent, practical book to develop an "internal" filter for your children.
Excellent, practical book for protecting our children from the scourge of pornography. As a father of five, I want to protect my children from this evil. That means I limit my children's access to devices and filter the internet that comes into my home. But no technological filter is perfect, and even a perfect filter can't protect my children from images shown them by friends or seen outside the home. That's where this book comes in. It will help your children to develop an internal filter to avoid these images and to know what to do if they are accidentally exposed. I read this to my 5, 7, and 9 year old children, and I think it was age appropriate for all. Of course, parents know their children best and should use their best judgment on when it's appropriate to present this material to their children.
Excellent book--all parents should read to their school age kids!
After my boys stumbled into some really bad pictures online, we read this book to them. I was so thankful to have such a great book to read, and my boys enjoyed it. I highly recommend it to any parent. I would say that this book is appropriate for any child age 6-7 and up. It does not get into any discussion at all of adult relations--it strictly talks about what good and bad pictures are and what you should do if you happen to see bad pictures. Do not be afraid of this topic with your kids! If your child has any access at all to a computer--at school, at friends' houses, or even when playing on your phone, you need to read this book to them.
A very biased and condescending book
This book is very biased. It frames pornography as objectively bad and addictive. These claims are not robustly supported by the many studies on the subject. The content about the brain is valuable. The book's strategies for avoiding porn are probably effective. The tone is very condescending and cheesy. I did my own research and used parts of this book as an outline to discuss the subject with my kids (ages 7, 10, 12). This book was useful to me as a starting point, and deciding what I did and didn't want to teach my kids. I delivered about 50% of it to my kids. If you already believe that porn is objectively bad and addictive, and you want complete abstinence and fear for your kids, then you'll like this book. If you are a person of facts and science and evidence, I doubt you will like this book.
EVERYONE NEEDS THIS BOOK!
Sadly, most people are too uncomfortable to REALLY discuss the biggest plagues facing our children today: PORNOGRAPHY and ADDICTION! How can we teach our children (and learn ourselves) ways to combat this disease and its catastrophic effects if we can’t talk about it openly? Good Pictures Bad Pictures is the solution!! I received my copy of Good Pictures Bad Pictures today and read it immediately. I wanted to see if it was really something my kids would listen to, understand, and learn from...IT IS! I was impressed with how effectively the authors conveyed all this information (on such sensitive topics) so appropriately! This book enables parents to properly explain the dangers of pornography, how our brains become addicted, how to avoid seeing porn and what to do when they ARE exposed (because they will be!) It also gives tips for parents and children to keep communications open in way that’s not so awkward! I think every person with a child (and even those without) needs a copy of this book!!
Best book on the effects of pornography and how to avoid its' trap. For Parents and Children to read together.
Pornography freaks me out. My husband and I have done everything we can to protect our home and kids, but I often feel like there's no one to talk to about any tried and true approaches because we are the first generation of parents who've had to deal with it at this pervasively high level. Even my younger siblings didn't have access to smart phones so my usual source of advice (my Mother) is as stumped as I am. But, we do what we can. This book is the first thing I've read that seemed to approach the issue in a way that makes sense. Most everything else I've read has been packed to the brim with endless warnings and no solutions. But this book provides both. And best of all, it's done in a way that involves the kids while remaining completely age appropriate. It manages to take the edge off the awkwardness of the pornography discussion, and teaches parents and children both about what pornography is, what it does to your brain, and FINALLY how to deal with it when you see it (cause you WILL see it) so that you don't get caught in it's trap. I've been telling all my fellow parents that they must get this book. We can't afford not to.
Excellent Resource
It's often hard for parents to keep up with all of the new cultural norms of today, due to how quickly technology is advancing. Sadly, with the Internet, pornography has become that, a norm. It's not a matter of if a child will see it, but rather when. I find as a parent, it can be difficult to find the right words to speak with children so young, but it's so important to speak about it openly before it happens. This book is a great starting point to prepare all ages of children on this topic. The child does not need to know the logistics of sex in order to have this book read to him/her. I greatly appreciated that aspect, as I was able to discuss pornography addiction in the same manner a parent would want to discuss drugs, alcohol, or stranger danger. This book gives children the tools and understanding to avoid the pornography trap in an appropriate, clean manner.
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